Side note- some quick background I have a 3 year old with some attitude, doesn't listen well, always talking back and challenging authority, you know typical 3 year old. Then we have a strong willed 18 month old who talks up a storm, wants mom a lot, doesn't get into playing with toys much, doesn't eat meals and gets into anything and everything that isnt a toy. Again very typical, I know I'm not alone here and that's why I'm sharing.
I don't know what it is or what puts us on this rotation. Can we just have good days everyday?
Unfortunately I know we can't. My kids aren't perfect, I'm not perfect. I have grumpy days and they do as well. What I can do is try to control myself better on these bad days.
Some days it's easy for me to feel woe is me, and that I've been dealt with extra difficult boys. ( I mean it seems mine are always the most misbehaved, weren't good sleepers, whiny toddlers, and awful eaters) On those days I have to remind myself to be thankful that I have my children because it took us awhile for our first and I remember wanting him more than anything, also that they are healthy, they don't have any life altering disabilities and they are some darn cute boys. While sometimes it helps, most of the times it doesn't. It's so hard to think logically during a day where the peace hasn't been kept for longer than 5 minutes at a time.
Im ashamed to say in my frustration, anger and stress I can act just like my boys and have seen my kids live out things they have seen me do. WOW does that ever put you in the bad mommy place!
( The other day Noah told me, I was making him really upset, wonder where he heard that one? And the same day ran to his room when I told him no and slammed the door. Yeah this momma is guilty of being one bad example)
I sigh a lot, I have thrown toys, yelled when I shouldn't, expected them to act way beyond their years, slammed a bedroom door, ignored them when I was in the middle of something I wanted or felt I needed to do. The makings of a great mom I know.
Earlier this year I got to be part or a Pre- launch book read of No More Perfect Moms by Jill Savage and I encourage all moms to read it. It's an awesome book and an easy read. This book let me breathe a sigh of relief throughout every chapter!
It helped to remind myself I am normal and my feelings are normal. Life just isn't perfect and it never will be and the sooner I adjust my expectations for how things should be in areas of my life the happier life I can live.
I wanted to leave you with an except from an email challenge that went along with the book the month before it came out.
“You know, motherhood has caused me to come face to face with my less-than-wonderful qualities. Sometimes my kids bring out the worst in me. However, God doesn’t waste a thing. He uses my kids to bring me to Him. When I come face to face with my shortcomings, my weaknesses, and my sin, it’s a reminder of my need for a God who wants me to be more like Him each and every day.” –Jill Savage, NO MORE PERFECT MOMS
Motherhood brings with it a wide range of emotions. It’s amazing the different feelings our kids can arouse in us in the course of one day. Joy, frustration, love, and anger can all bombard us in the span of an hour. With the wide range of emotions, it’s easy to feel like a failure when our words or actions don’t match up with the love we have for our children.
Our kids seem to learn from an early age how to push our buttons, making us want to raise the white flag of surrender and shout, “I can’t do this!” We can’t do this on our own, but things are possible with God’s help. Yes, raising kids is messy, and many times we fail, letting our emotions get the best of us. However, with God’s grace, we can learn from our failures and become more like our Creator in the process.
Challenge: The next time you let your emotions take control, take a minute to honestly apologize to your kids. Admit that you failed and ask for their forgiveness. Not only will you be setting a positive example on how to handle imperfections, you’ll draw closer to your child and your God in the process.
So just wanted to share in case any of you other momma's have had a bad day, week or month, or year with your kiddos. You are not alone! We are in fact, just more imperfect moms trying to do their best!
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