Letting my Boys be Kids

My Random thoughts for today.....

Last Wednesday was one of those annoying, frustrating, grumpy days.  The boys seemed extra whiny all morning and didn't want to play.  It also was one of those days when the events of the day seemed to be like such a big deal at the time, and now looking back and talking about it to a friend I realized how small and insignificant all the "bad" things of the day were.

 I really started to go downhill in mood and get my tail feathers ruffled that afternoon after Noah woke up from his nap.  I won't go through all of the events but here were the kickers.

Noah  just wanted to roll around on the couch and cry and whine, and it just really pushed my buttons because I didn't want Carson waking up.  I started to freak out (which usually doesn't help, I never fail to try it anyway)  and made things worse.  After he calmed down he asked for daddy who was working outside so I gladly helped him go out and see what dad was up to.  As I sat inside, I just thought about how I acted and was embarassed.  Noah is only 3, and I was expecting way more out of him than he was even able to comprehend.  He was waking up, still tired, and wanted something but instead I just sshhh'd him and got mad at him for letting out his emotion.

He played outside for awhile and around dinner I went out to check on him.   I stepped out into the garage to see his play shoes, the ones that I had put on his feet.  I look over at the shoe shelf to see that his new nice tennis shoes were MIA.

Momma was steaming.  I just just finished laundry  for the day.  I had just washed all the boys tennis shoes.
I walked out to see Noah playing in the mud his daddy was making from washing off his tractor in his new shoes, jeans, and brand new never worn before WHITE Old Navy tee.

Now in retrospect... And reading the print here.  Really Not that big of a deal. There are real problems going on right now everywhere in the world but at that moment, I was madder than a hornet and the rest of the day was done for and it SEEMED like a big deal.

In case you were wondering what happened to the shoes I put on him, I forgot to mention he changed them himself without his father knowing because they were "squeaky"  meaning he got them wet and then wanted a nice dry clean pair to wear!

I got so worked up, I had the worse tension headache all night, I sulked, didn't talk to anyone, and went to bed right when the boys went because my head couldn't take it anymore.  I ruined my day because of a reaction I let myself have to something so minute.  Why is it so hard letting go of things some times?

I expect a lot from people.  I expect them to know what I want.  I expect them to act how I want them to act.  I expect my kids to be perfect when perfection doesn't exist.  I expect them to never act like "typical" boys and not make messes.  And what I realized is so many times, I expect my kids to not act like kids.  I expect them to understand what I do and care for my house like I do and it's not possible!  Heck some adults can't even fathom being neat and clean like I expect my house to be.

This morning  I got to stay home with my boys.  I needed to go get groceries, but instead we stayed home. I wanted to play and make messes with them.  I wanted to see their 1 and 3 year old smiles and hear their laughter.  I tried to mask my expectations and just things be!  I watched them be kids!